Mega Jokes Thread. Share your jokes here too 
Q: What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
A: Stress is when wife is pregnant, Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and Panic is when both are pregnant.
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
AH BENG : " HIJKLMNO ! "
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
AH BENG : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
TEACHER : Why are you late?
AH BENG : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
AH BENG : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Q: Why did they stop printing PAMELA ANDERSON stamps in U.S?
A: Because people started licking the wrong side
Father to son after exam says: " Let me see your report card."
Son says: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
Interviewer to Millionaire says: "To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire says: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer says: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire says: "A Billionaire"
Four Secrets to a Happy Marriage (from a Male Point of View)
1. It is important to find a woman who cooks and cleans.
2. It is important to find a woman who makes good money.
3. It is important to find a woman who loves to have sex.
4. It is very important that these three women never meet!!
Ah Beng to a long-distance telephone operator: "Could you please tell me the time difference between Taipei and Las Vegas?"
Operator: "Just a minute......"
Ah Beng: "Thank You," and puts down the phone.
Ah Beng ordered a pizza and the waitress asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
A mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, It's time to go to school!" But why, Mom? I don't want to go. Give me two reasons why you don't want to go. Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too! Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready. Give me two reasons why I should ...go to school. Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!
Amy: Can people tell future by cards? Bob: I think yes, because my mother looks at my report cards and tell me what is going to happen when daddy gets home!
Subject: Mega Jokes Thread. 
Sat Feb 20, 2010 10:55 pm
